Wednesday, June 14, 2006

A Cautionary Tale

I was telling my learned friend, Martin, that I had consumed vast quantities of M&Ms this morning and as a result of the energy surge I had cleaned the apartment however I was now suffering from a horrible M&M downer.

Martin informed me that tartrazine can do that ... just reading the word tartrazine made me feel ill and so, in order to regain my health, I opted for the 'red wine cure' and explained my rationale to Gert, issuing my very own medical dispensation at the same time.

I thought he already knew I could do this thing with my eyes and I leaned into him, asking if my eyes looked okay after eating the tartrazine.

I wiggled my eyeballs rapidly ... Gert leapt back, shouting a very bad word and was still clutching his chest sometime later.

I almost fell over laughing.

You see, I can move my eyes rapidly ... kind of wiggle them, and clearly it's rather disturbing up close.

Gert's recovering slowly and I do believe the wine will cure me.

3 comments:

wandering-woman said...

LOL. Can't you post an eye wiggling post red wine and yellow M&M video for us? (And actually Saint Gert's reaction sounds pretty entertaining as well, maybe a quick scene from his side as well..)

David said...

Since your mention of tartrazine I found on wikipedia that there is an urban legend that the tartrazine in Mountain Dew causes shrinkage of testicles.

I have subsequently stopped drinking Mountain Dew!

woman wandering said...

Dear w-w, no ... there will be no eye-wiggling post red wine and yellow m&m video for anyone, it's better that way ... it's a gift, I can't just put it out there.

Poor Gert ... I laugh everytime I think of his reaction.

Thanks david, I think many will be grateful to Martin, you and wikipedia ... and yes, very wise to stop drinking Mountain Dew. ;)