Wednesday, June 03, 2009

A blessing and a teaching


Wish I was there, Istanbul, originally uploaded by - di.

These days seem to be the days of the Di meltdowns, as the exhibition leaves no space for everything else that needs space ... and now wasn't the time to find out about ant invasions, something I had no previous experience of until recently.

I'm a little famous for having the great idea and not quite imagining the total story. So I can fly to Naples but run out of money before reaching home. I can say yes to a job that ends up costing me 400euro to carry out. I can be excited about a city art exhibition but fail to put together the cost sheet that would remind me that there are printing and framing costs ...

This is my life.
Gert is patient and mostly people find this little quirk of mine amusing.

But how could you forget ... ???
Oh I just do.

This morning the ants were waving hi from the honey and marching home via the bookcase to their secret hideout - the one we can't quite locate - when I realised that printing and framing looked all but impossible however ... what did the Dali Lama have to say about situations like mine?

He said, 'exile, suffering, loss - everything- is, if seen in the right light, a blessing and a teaching.' I borrowed that particular quote from Pico Iyer's excellent book, 'Sun After Dark'.

And then I had a little chuckle when I noticed I had marked in that same book, 'The music of the world, as Camus lost in Prague, observes, finds its way more easily into this heart grown less secure.'

My heart, my life, my pursuit of a career as a self-employed photographer ... it's all insecure. I live from one adventure (with its associated and usually unimagined costs) to the next adventure and this exhibition, much as it pained me this morning and saw me crawl back into my bed for 30 minutes of wallowing in sadness, is a grand adventure.

The people I have met and the photographs taken have been pure magic. I'm not raving about my technical skills or photography but I'm talking of the connections between these people who are simply allowing me to enter their worlds and capture them.

I made myself get up again, after all, I have quite a number of photographs to take today, then process, then deliver for printing tomorrow and ... I remembered that we had more 30x45cm frames somewhere, the ones I intended using when I first said yes to this exhibition actually ... in some 'safe place', that place where I lose most things.

The gods smiled down on me and I found them, on top of the wardrobe in those black rubbish bags that kept the dust off them ... of course. I also have a little collection of the same frames in various sizes and I do believe it's going to be okay ... as long as the printers can get my enlargements done in time.

But then there's this other exhibition/opening planned for our NGO office move in August. I have to be in Brussels on Friday taking photographs of a meeting that is part of the documentary element of this second exhibiton.

Friday ... oh yes, that would be the day I pick up the city exhibition prints and frame them and then ummmm hang them in time for the Saturday opening.

So ... we laugh or we cry.
We stand back and admire the mess that creates a life tapestry or we go back to bed.

I think though, that tonight, I might just have a nice bottle of cheap Italian red wine to carry me on through the insanity of this week.

Tot ziens from Belgie.

12 comments:

Gary Rith Pottery Blog said...

!!!! what a week!

Di Mackey said...

Oh yes! and it's not done yet.

I'm back and processing photographs now, having had one person suddenly cancel their inclusion in the exhibition while I was out and then thinking I was locked out of the apartment for the afternoon.

It's entering the Land of Surreal now ...

Jessica said...

I don't find that specific quirk of yours amusing at all, dearest mother.

debra said...

Being self-employed in the arts is an interesting journey, isn't it. Always an adventure. But, then, that is what life is.

The Unrepentant Gallivanter said...

It is inexpensive....not cheap! I will have a glass for you tonight - you have one for me.

RD said...

Dear Di, life sounds so very busy for you right now. I will think of you and wish you deep breaths and some moments of calm amidst the storm! Take care.

Di Mackey said...

Oh Debra, it is. I was talking with a painter today ...

Ummm, did you mean glass glass, or glass bottle, Ms Unrepentant Gallivanter. I had one for you :)
5.50euro is my favourite Italian red at the moment. I should have filled my suitcase with your cheaper excellent wine while I was in Naples.

And thank you, RD. I stopped for a while tonight, sat down with the red wine and soon ... well, I will possibly panic again however I did meet and photograph some truly excellent people today :)

Di Mackey said...

Dearest daughter, it's possible that anyone living with me would find that quirk difficult ... I find it difficult oftentimes ;)

Catherine said...

What a wonderful photo - it looks so relaxing!
As for the ants, I've lived in Auckland (a long time ago) so have definitely experienced ant invasions - and work as an accountant (or at least assistant to an accountant) in my day job, so I'm very familiar with how many creative people share that same quirk - and I love to do accounts for people who are working at their dream job and making it pay.

paris parfait said...

Oh Di - ah, yes, that "safe" place. :) This week sounds like your typical mad dash from one obligation to another. I think you thrive on self-created chaos (and you know I mean that in the best possible way). And all will be right in the end! Best of luck w/ the exhibition. No doubt it will go well and your photographs - and your talent - will shine. xoxox

Deadlyjelly said...

My friend, you are living the dream. You are a brave, staunch warrior, fighting for the right to live your life by your own rules. You rock! Yay!

x

Di Mackey said...

Thanks Catherine, and I wish you could work with my accounts :) Belgium is the land of complicated taxes and etc ... sigh.

Oh yes, that 'safe' place, Tara. I've been thinking about my self-created chaos and suspect it is born out of my intense curiousity about everything. I have this hunger to live, and to know people and of course, to photograph them and hear their stories.

I survived this bout of madness and I'm pleased with the exhibition, now for the mad dash towards Paris and Italy. xoxo

Hey there, Ms Deadlyjelly! How are you? You rock more, Ms published author. I need to catch up with you and your world one day soon. Hmmm, I should commit to an email and thank you xoxo